Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. 1 Corinthians 13:7
There is a reason you were attracted to your mate. There was a reason you were so crazy about them you made a lifelong committment to be with them, before God no less!! When life happens, we tend to lose sight of those reasons. I am thoroughly convinced if Christians did what 1 Corinthians 13 said, and actually just focused on one specific area, our churches would not be floundering, but bulging at the seams of the rafters and walls!
Depending on the version of the Bible you are reading, it basically is worded like this, “Love believes the best of every person…” In other words, God’s love in us focuses on the best in people. It doesn’t mean we are walking in a La La Land, where we are totally unaware that evil exist, but when it comes to the “small” things, love focuses on the best in others.
Many years ago, I had begun to notice certain things about some people my husband and I knew (yes, I finally get to tell off on myself! :/). It started really small, but these certain, small things were negatives. They were true, but instead of taking them to prayer, I took them to my husband. My intentions were good in my mind. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t imagining something or perceiving something incorrectly. As I told him the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, “Stop talking about that.” I continued and asked my husband if he had seen what I did. He had seen the same thing, but told me he felt it was something we didn’t need to discuss, even though it was true. When he said that the Holy Spirit spoke again, “When you talked to your husband about that, did it change anything in that person? Or, did it change something in you?” BAM! Oh, yes!! We cannot ignore this one, precious reader!
When we see something that isn’t conducive to someone’s spiritual growth, something that needs to be changed for them to move forward, something that is a hindrance to themselves (I am talking about detriments to that person, not to the entire church. When it involves hurting others in the church and elsewhere it MUST be dealt with.) it is God calling us to prayer.
When you talk about something, it is like fanning flames. The Bible tells us how powerful spoken words really are! The thing you talk about the most will eventually rule you because you can’t talk about something you aren’t thinking about. As a man thinks in his heart so is he, the Bible says. What you think about, you talk about! Once you begin to think and vent negativity, you become a pessimist who stresses over every little negative thing and then you have to “vent” it. What comes out of a vent? Air. What happens when air is blown on a flame? IT ROARS!!! I think you see where we are going with this thing.
Now, we all know if you do the opposite of something, you are going to get the opposite result. With a small tweak in your car you can throw the car from reverse into drive. Reverse, we know is going backwards, and drive is going forward and getting where you want to be! Ahhh…you are so smart!! You know what I am up to again, don’t you??
If you are looking at every negative, not so fun, flat out drives you up the wall thing your mate does, it isn’t going to deepen your love! Make a list of everything that attracted you to your mate, and the things that endeared them to you! They are still there. Begin to focus on the positive(s). Tell your mate you appreciate that positive! Tell others what makes you proud of your mate. “Vent” the positive and not the negative. Give the flames of romance a chance to smoulder again! Let peace permeate your home and mind.
We never think anything of “tweaking” anything else in our lives! We tweak our diets and feel empowered, we tweak our schedules and feel empowered, we tweak our exercise program, and feel empowered! Why is it we never think of tweaking our actions, reactions, and thoughts toward those we should cherish and love most and empower our marriages and families? Something to think about!
Blessings, precious reader! Make your focus positive and empower your life! See you soon!! Simply, Juliana
Let no foul or polluting language, nor evil word nor unwholesome or worthless talk [ever] come out of your mouth, but only such [speech] as is good and beneficial to the spiritual progress of others, as is fitting to the need and the occasion, that it may be a blessing and give grace (God’s favor) to those who hear it. Ephesians 4:29
18-19 People who shrug off deliberate deceptions,
saying, “I didn’t mean it, I was only joking,”
Are worse than careless campers
who walk away from smoldering campfires. Proverbs 26:18-19 The Message Bible
It is important to have friends and couples to socialize with throughout your marriage. Whether you have been married 1 month or 50 years, you need couples of “like precious faith”. Iron sharpens iron, and it is never a good idea go be an isolated sheep. It is the isolated sheep the wolf always goes for because they are so unprotected. They have no support system and everyone needs one!
Find the couples Sunday School class at church, or watch the bulletin for cook outs, game nights, fun trips, or a group going to a sporting event. Build a support group with the people in your church! With that being said, there can be some pitfalls to this, too! Take these to heart so you don’t fall into them.
It is so important that you uplift your mate in public. I have seen people do long-term damage to their spouses by trying to be funny and making them the butt of a joke. I don’t care how funny that may be to a group, you, or anyone else, nobody likes to be made fun of or have their less than perfect traits brought out in public and poked fun at! All this does is stir up strife, upset, and hurt feelings. If this happens too much, it is very likely you will find yourself sitting at home and not going out anymore, or maybe even sitting at home alone!
Every word spoken out of your mouth toward your mate, and others in the body of Christ should be uplifting and encouraging. If something is bothering you about your spouse, you should not use the public as a platform to “correct” whatever it is. Believe me, it will not get corrected through public embarrassment!
I have seen couples do this and I think they do it because they mistakenly think, if the world knows about what is bothering them at home, the spouse will stop it so they can’t be humiliated again. How ridiculous does that sound? It sounds ridiculous because that is what it is! DO NOT AIR YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY IN PUBLIC!
Your spouse is not a joke and you should not be treating them as though they were. So many things tie back to childhood! What if your spouse was bullied, mocked, had the reputation of being the “school geek”. When you do these types of things, even in fun, it is a reminder of uglier days gone by to them. You should be the person your mate feels safest with! You are the one they should be able to run to when it seems the whole world is imploding on them. If you have been having fun at their expense, you will be like everyone else that has purposely hurt them and you will lose your mate’s respect toward you. They will feel alone and isolated, even in the marriage where love is meant to be abounding and your role is to be supportive, especially emotionally!
Look closely at our scriptures and meditate on them. 1. NEVER let anything that is not building up of another come out of your mouth! 2. The tongue is powerful and is many times likened to having the power that can set a forest ablaze! Have you ever heard of someone’s temper set ablaze? Then to say, “I was just kidding!” makes it even worse! Just because something is a joke to you, doesn’t automatically deem it funny to everyone else.
My husband and I had attended a social gathering with some other couples. There was a man who was doing this very thing with his wife…laughing at her expense. I don’t know what he thought, because some were laughing because they did think it was funny, others were laughing because they were uncomfortable, and she wasn’t laughing at all! Her eyes were shooting daggers at her husband and he was completely unphased as he continued his stand up comic routine about her! I can only imagine what happened when she got him home!!
Husbands and wives, if you want peace in your home, don’t breed contention outside of it! It seems some people are just born contrary, but many times I have found, there is a root of it that is coming from somewhere other than “they were just born cranky”. If your mate had told you something bothers them, then LISTEN! Don’t do what they have told you bothers them, and then expect them to be happy and peaceful with you! If you have been asked to stop and you don’t stop, YOU have bred the contention in that person and your life will be filled with something that is uncomfortable and aggravating for all. Don’t press negative buttons, in other words, and expect a loving and peaceful mate!
A loving, peaceful relationship is one that is always being cultivated! Make sure we are good “husbandmen” of our homes! In the long run, it will reap great and wonderful benefits!
Blessings to you, precious reader!! I will see you soon! Simply, Juliana
My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. John 15:12
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; … 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 ESV
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Colossians 3:19 ESV
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7 ESV
The forgiveness the world offers and the forgiveness the Christian is to offer are in direct opposition to each other. The world says, “I forgive, but I will never forget!” The Christian is SUPPOSED to say and mean, “I forgive you, and the incident is not only forgiven, but forgetten” and the love of God is supposed to be restored. Now, I am not talking about horrific sin. If someone abused your child in a felony manner, you would never entrust your child to that person again. You would forgive (giving up all resentment and bitterness), but forgiveness in this case does not mean restoration of a relationship and blind trust! Forgiveness does not always equate to restoration of a relationship.
When a relationship has become physically, sexually, or mentally abusive you MUST walk away from that relationship. I mean disagreements and arguments over things that just come from two personalities and view points not always seeing eye to eye. When couples start taking the attitude of “I’ll forgive, but never forget” or “I’ll forgive, but I will never do (fill in the blank) for you, again!” then there is trouble and that trouble will only get worse. Offense has been taken at that point and bitterness is sure to root and grow. A root of bitterness chokes all life out of everything it touches, and especially marriage.
When I was over the Ladies Ministry at a particular church, I was expected to be there for women who needed a confidante to pray with them. I had one lady come to me and I can never forget the horror this dear woman went through as a child and the hurt that carried over into her adulthood.
This lady had a mother who had mental issues. When she was a child the only place she felt truly safe and peaceful was at her grandparents‘ house. She would always spend the night with her grandmother, to whom she was very close, every Sunday night. She explained to me that, that night was the highlight of her week. This young lady‘s mother was extremely religious! Don’t ever confuse religion with spiritual maturity. God said spiritual maturity is measured by the degree of His love we walk in. The mother to this young woman was a Pharisee. She walked in legalism. She served in the church in many capacities and never missed a service, nor did the children. Unfortunately, love was not shown to this woman by her mother when she was a child and she was raised in a great deal of fear and mind control.
This grandmother had a neighbor who had a daughter who had a child out-of-wedlock. This was back in the ’60s when this just was not done and if a young lady found herself in this predicament she was hidden by her family due to shame and embarrassment. This woman’s mother had told her not to tell anyone this young lady did not have a husband. The following Sunday the young lady came to the church with her baby and her mother.
The lady I was counseling always sat with her grandmother in church and a friend the age of the little girl (at that time) would sit with them, too. Due to the mother’s legalism she tolerated nothing that seemed wrong to her from the little girl. The least thing the mother perceived as wrong would set the woman off into an abusive, enraged frenzy! As the children sat together, the mother sat on the pew in front of them and the unwed mother and her mother sat down the pew from the disturbed mother. The little girl who sat with the daughter leaned over and asked where the girl’s husband was. The lady told me she felt the blood drain from her face. She did not know whether to lie and say he wasn’t there or to tell the truth because they were in church and her mother would also punish her for lying. There was no winning for her in this instance. She whispered to her friend the girl had no husband and made her promise to tell no one. She knew if her mother found out, it would be horrific punishment, but felt it better to be honest before God than to lie to save her own skin.
That night the little girl packed her bag and went to the car with her mother to go to her grandmother’s as usual. When the mother pulled into the driveway, she stopped the car, turned to the little girl and asked her if she had told her friend about the unwed mother. The little girl told the truth and answered yes and why she did what she did. The mother then became enraged and began to hit the little girl. She hit her face, neck, and arms as she screamed at the little girl repeatedly, “I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL THAT!!!” The little girl felt not only the pain of the beating, but sheer fear at the mother’s loss of control. She turned her body to the door of the passenger side of the car and the mother began to beat her back. Finally, she stopped and screamed, “You will NEVER spend the night on Sunday nights with your grandmother again and when I get you home I will whip you and your father will whip you!!!”
When they got home the father met them at the door and the mother told him the little girl had said something about the unwed mother and that she was going to whip her and he was, as well. She then beat her with a belt, handed the belt to the father and watched while he whipped her with the belt as well. The little girl never again was allowed to spend the night with her grandmother on Sunday nights. As this lady told the story, she wept as though it had happened yesterday. She was my age. The reason it was so tormenting was for the fact the husband ‘punished’ her in their marriage the same way. If he became angry enough he would tell her, “I will never do such and such with you (or for you) again!” and he wouldn’t.
Friends, you cannot expect people to never make a mistake in your relationship with them, and especially with your mate. To forgive is a requirement and God gives grace and mercy and expects us to do the same. To do anything else is not only a sin, but is considered mental abuse, or it is by the state of Texas! When you torment someone with their mistakes “making them pay” you in no way are acting Christlike and you have allowed the enemy access to your marriage, relationships and your home!
Satan comes to do three things…kill, steal and destroy. He will kill your love for one another, steal the blessing from your home, and destroy your marriage in the process. I haven’t even touched on what divorce and seeing these things do to your children! We must be imitators of Christ and keep the fleshly man, who is capable of things you never dreamed you could do, under control!
We all have lost our tempers, but there is a point of no return in relationships, and we should never come even close to that line!! You will NEVER lose your temper and not regret it…think about it.
The Bible says a man who deals unkindly with his wife, his very prayers will be hindered. God means business when He tells us to love one another! Faith works by love and you will receive NOTHING from God without it!
Have you prayed for sometime for something just to see no answer to that prayer? Check your love walk and the first place you must check it is at home. Love ALWAYS begins at home and so does ministry. If you cannot love the very one you have given an oath before God to, to love, honor and cherish, how can you possibly love the unlovable in the world? You cannot! This is one reason churches fail to grow beyond a certain number and even decline. No matter how much we can say the gifts were in operation, if we have not love one for another, we are as sounding brass and a tinkling cymbal and it profits us nothing! Love one another, unfailingly!
Blessings to you, precious reader! I pray your marriage and your family is blessed, as well! Let us strive to walk in the light of the gospel and be salt to the world around us! Go with God as He goes with you!! I will see you soon! Simply, Juliana
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Ephesians 5:22-24
Every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands. Proverbs 14:1
However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:33
She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:12
I want to look at these verses and really ponder them for a moment. Wives are admonished to submit to their husband’s authority as they follow Christ’s example. Submit in the Greek literally means “to obey and make subject to”. This does not mean the wife is put on the level of a child and the husband makes all the decisions. This does mean when there is a major decision to be made and you have a husband who is Godly and wise, you should be able to trust his decision in knowing what is best for the family and be able to respect and trust it.
Think of the Proverbs 31 woman. It said her husband bragged on her in the city gates and cherished her above rubies. If you will notice, this lady was quite the business woman. She knew how to deal with their employees, she took care of the children in grand style, and she made very major decisions about business and did it without running to her husband to ask “if I may”. Her husband knew he had married a good and wise woman and a woman who could be trusted. She was not going to put them in the poor house by unwise spending, he did not have to worry if the children were properly cared for, and he could do what was necessary as a provider because she took on some of the burden of running a home, and she honored God and respected her husband.
Many years ago when Aggie Girl and the Rev. were toddlers, hubby had to go out-of-town on business and would be gone for a week. It never failed, when he left town one of our appliances would break completely down. This particular week, the dishwasher went to dishwasher heaven. We had Vacation Bible School during this time and I was one of the teachers. My co-teacher had come over to my house to work on the next day’s art project with me. While she sat there I received a call from the hardware store we always did business with. I had talked to my husband and told him earlier where all I had shopped, gave him the brand names and prices and we agreed on the dishwasher that met our budget and household needs. Aggie Girl was 2 years old and she is now 23 and I still have that dishwasher and it has never missed a beat! It works as good as new to this day! I just threw that in because I think that is pretty amazing!
As I talked to the store representative, I told them when would be the best time to come and deliver my new dishwasher. I noticed the lady was looking at me in a very odd manner. I had known this woman for some time and she always questioned my decisions as a wife. I found this to be odd because she was a nurse and a career woman, yet she picked at everything I did insinuating I wasn’t as “submissive” as I should be. When I got off the phone she said in a very derogatory tone, “I cannot believe you just buy a dishwasher while your husband is out-of-town! You didn’t even let him see if he liked it!!” Well, for one thing my husband couldn’t care less about what a dishwasher looks like. I have to chuckle to this day about that one. Secondly, I had already discussed our budget with him and had called him again to be sure the purchase was a go. BUT, if I had not, how sad if I had been a wife my husband could not even depend on to make a decision about a simple dishwasher! In fact, I asked him had he felt disrespected by me going ahead with the installation while he was gone and his response was, “I would have been upset and worried if you couldn’t make so simple a decision! You took the pressure from me by knowing you would do what was right and what we discussed. Why would I be upset?”
Wives, our husbands are in trouble and our marriages are as well if we cannot work together as a well oiled machine in the running of the business of our households and finances. This brings me to my major point! Not long ago a lady came to me and said, “My husband will no longer go to church with me and he doesn’t want me anymore. My marriage is in serious trouble.” She gave me no details so I began to pray and listen to the Holy Spirit. He let me know the lady knew what the problem was but was not willing to admit it to me. I agreed with her in prayer for the healing of her marriage and when she “agreed” in prayer I could tell she didn’t believe or take seriously one word of it! I thought, “Man, this marriage is headed to divorce court for sure if she doesn’t get a grip on her attitude!”
I found out that very day what some of the problem was. This lady and her husband do not have a great deal of money. They have several children and the lady spends in excess. The husband then has to balance all of her “wants” with all the children’s needs. One of the children has had terrible medical problems so they are strapped with hospital bills, doctor bills, and daily medicine bills. This woman has disrespected her husband by not being sensitive to the pressure she has put him under with all of her spending. In essence, she has done what Proverbs 14:1 refers to. She has torn her own home apart through foolish spending.
Several years ago I was a speaker at a women’s conference. I had planned to speak on one thing but God changed it at the last-minute. He wanted me to speak on finances and how it can make or break a marriage. Years and years ago, hubby and I had been in horrible debt. Every time he got ready to pay bills and balance the checkbook, I would literally almost get sick to my stomach I would be so nervous. One day God spoke to me and told me He wanted me out of the work force because He had other things in ministry for me to do. I was floored! I knew we needed my salary as a teacher to eat! God began to speak to me “Dave Ramsey” strategies before Dave Ramsey was even known! I began to do EXACTLY what the Holy Spirit told me to do. We were in so much credit card debt, we literally had to hold our mortgage payment until the last second just to be able to buy groceries. Within eight months of doing what God told us to do, we had paid off ALL credit card debt! It was more than 8,000.00 but it might as well have been 80,000.00. We just did not have that money, but with God’s wisdom and through obedience to Him it was gone and we have never fallen into that trap again! All we owed after that was the mortgage. God began to tell me how to pay my 30 year mortgage off early. I did exactly what He said and we took what was a 30 year mortgage and paid our house off in 11 years. God is good!!
At this conference God had me give this testimony. My eyes kept falling to a young woman in the audience. I knew she and her husband had had terrible financial difficulty. The Lord told me the husband was at the point of breaking because the wife did not respect her husband when he told her he needed her to stop spending so much money! She listened and I could tell she did not like what I was saying. I saw that lady about a week later and she said to me, “I went into my daughter’s closet (they had two children) and I counted over 100 shirts!” The first word that came to my mind was “rebellion”. She was a rebellious wife to her husband and to God. I knew there was no changing her even to save her marriage.
This couple ended up declaring bankruptcy, lost their home due to foreclosure, and not long afterward the husband walked out. The woman was left literally in shock. She hardened her heart to God and when she did she tore her family apart through her own foolishness.
Wives, one of the major ways you can show respect to your husband is to listen and submit when he tells you there is a budget and for the good of the family stay within the confines of it. Nothing puts pressure and stress on a husband as debt does! It will squeeze him like a vice!! As loving wives, we want our husbands to be happy, peaceful, and full of joy. None of these things can exist in the husband if he is having to tread the water of debt for weeks, months and years on end!
When this happens we have even opened the door to sin, because we have given cause for him to be angry and resentful! I don’t care if you have money to burn, if your husband is not in agreement with a purchase, you should NOT buy it! He has a reason for what he is thinking if he is a good man and a Godly man! This is where your trust of him and his judgement comes in. You are required to be submissive to your husband and in doing so you have obeyed God.
Don’t be like the woman at the conference and harden your heart and do what you want until you no longer can feel the conviction of the Holy Spirit and the warning of what it can lead to. My uncle, who was my pastor, always said, “We may be playing for fun, but the devil is playing for keeps!” Your stakes are far too high! If you love your husband, you will respect and protect his best interest and the interest of your family!
Be a wife and a mother that builds her house and would never tear it down with your own hands or give the devil an open door for someone else to tear it apart! Save yourself and your family unnecessary heartache! Remember, your husband equates respect to love…show him he is more important than things or any desire you could possibly have in your heart! Telling the world how much you love your husband does no good if you do not even show that love to him at home! Let our love not be mere words, but deeds as the Bible says!
Blessings to you, precious reader! I will see you soon. Go with God as God goes with you! Simply, Juliana
I am not a marriage blogger, but God has put this on my heart and I am jumping into it with both feet! I have watched marriages suffer and even be destroyed over “little” things! I have seen people marry that were deeply in love, only to see that marriage fail and the same couple who stared lovingly into each others eyes on their wedding day, be arch enemies just mere years later! What happened to the picturesque relationship? The “little foxes” of life ate the vine, and we all know the vine is what gives everything life!
Almost everything you can think of you eat, and use to sustain life comes from plants. Plants are tied to seeds and seeds are tied to good ground in which to grow. Even the beef you eat had to have grass and hay to graze from in order for you have that juicy steak! Forgive me, my vegetarians! I am from Texas and I am rooted in this! Back to my point! Your marriage and relationship with your spouse is no different. You have to cultivate your relationship at all times.
In the beginning of your relationship, you were putting your best foot forward. You were in a type of “honeymoon” stage that was filled with romance, sweet nothings, thoughtful and out of the ordinary acts such as putting a sweet card in the driver’s seat for your sweetheart to find before they left for work, surprise flowers just to show you were thinking of them, or something as simple as showing up with their favorite candy bar in hand!
Let us face it, this phase is a phase! You may still do some of those things, but anyone who has been together for more than a year or two, should be seeing a maturing of the relationship and a blooming into deeper things. The masks come off and you still like what you see when they do. You learn to relax and enjoy each other without having to impress the other one. You find commonality in various things and the love deepens. Then the day arrives where the two become one in marriage and reality sets in!
Reality is a good thing! It is another necessary phase of your relationship. You learn to adapt to each other and your day-to-day habits. You begin to see yourselves as a family and not just a couple. Adjustments are necessary and it is necessary to keep your relationship in the boundaries God set up for the marriage, home, and family. This is where many couples become totally lost! They tend to try to have the marriage their parent’s had if it was a good one, or they try to stay too independent instead of realizing you are now a team and unity is a must!
When it comes down to it, God made the husband head of the house! It is sad, but not all men respected this place of authority, but abused it treating it as though that meant they were “slave drivers”, not loving partners willing to serve his wife in any way she needed. Being the head means you see to the needs of your family and you do not leave that for someone else to do. The head is the provider of protection, security, love, and necessities! A husband is to look EXACTLY like Jesus looks in the life of a Christian. The husband patterns his behavior and attitudes toward his wife to be exactly as those of Christ toward the church.
With Jesus we know we can come anytime we have a need and that need is met! We come and unconditional love and forgiveness is given and nothing is held over our heads from our past. We know He is there for us and longs to spend time with us! We know Jesus gave up everything and willingly gave His life and all His comforts and His place in Heaven up to serve us. We know the reason Jesus was able to endure such a horrific death was because He saw us as a prize to be won and there was only one way to have it and that was to endure the hardship and pain of the cross. The same is expected from God with a husband. A husband should not only be willing, but DOES give his wife time, and she doesn’t play “second fiddle” to hobbies, the children, serving others, or anything else! His interest is in her first, his forgiveness is given quickly and he is never to revisit what the wife did wrong and what she has asked forgiveness for. He puts her needs and interest ahead of his own. This is loving the wife as Christ loved the church! The husband becomes representative of Jesus to his wife in every sense of the word!!
I am not writing this to you, husbands because I am a woman or a wife. I did not even know this until the Holy Spirit showed it to me this very moment!! I have to admit, in most of the articles I read on marriage, it is mainly geared to the wife and what she can do for her husband. Don’t worry the wife’s day is coming in this! I meant to write about wives honoring and respecting their husbands today, but God is saving that one for tomorrow. Know IT IS COMING!! Until then, we have to lay a firm and correct foundation and it seems to be starting with the head of the home! I have never liked the fact that wives, many times, are taught what to do for the husband so the wife can get the response she wants out of him. This is not the way of love! A wife owes the husband a debt of love and the husband owes the same.
Pride says, ” I will do for you so in turn you will do for me.” This is baseless of love…it is self-interest and self-interest is pride! It is concerned mainly with “What is good for me and what I WANT!“ No wonder marriages are failing right and left, even with marriage counseling! I have come to loathe the words “This is what I NEED FROM YOU!“ The words should be what does my mate need from me and how can I serve them better and it needs to come from both sides, not just one! I promise you, if you give up your self-interest, husband AND WIFE, you will see a different side to your mate! Concentrate on how you can love and show your love more and you will be surprised the reaction you get! Be consistent with it! Don’t do it hit or miss. When it is hit and miss, it is a tell-tale sign it was done for you to gain something, not done for the sake of giving from a heart rooted in love!
Thank you for reading, precious reader! I appreciate your time very much! Tomorrow we will delve into what wives are responsible for and how freeing it is when we do things God’s way concerning our relationships! Blessings to you in abundance! Simply, Juliana